Understanding the Difference Between Intuition and Anxiety

One question I get a lot from clients is: how do you tell the difference between intuition and anxiety? This is especially relevant when they are trying to find their own voice and become more confident in new roles. How can you recognize your inner voice trying to tell you something important and differentiate it from anxiety driven by fear?

The Quick Rule for Differentiation

My favorite rule is simple: if you’re being driven towards something you want, it’s more likely to be intuition. If you’re being driven away from something you fear, it’s more likely to be anxiety.

Intuition pulls you towards something important, like your goals or values. It feels like a quiet reminder of things that matter—like a good mentor giving you gentle advice.

On the other hand, anxiety often drives you away from something you fear—failure, rejection, or uncomfortable emotions. Anxiety threatens you with catastrophic imagined scenarios and a storm of “what if”s.

Understanding Intuition

Intuition is your internal compass. It nudges you towards opportunities that align with your core values. For example, consider a situation where you have a big presentation at work. You’ve prepared endlessly for weeks. You’ve done your research, gathered feedback, and rehearsed thoroughly. The night before the big meeting, you feel a pull to stay up late and prepare more.

If it’s intuition, it might sound something like this: “I just remembered a comment the client made a few weeks ago about a new direction they were considering. There was a relevant article in that journal today—maybe I’ll give it a quick skim just to be prepared if the topic comes up.”

In this case, you’re being drawn towards something. You’ve identified a specific task rooted in real data and events. The idea can be captured in a well-defined task, and there’s no threat involved. It’s simply something that will strengthen your presentation.

Recognizing Anxiety

Now, let’s look at anxiety. If it’s anxiety, your thoughts might go like this: “What if the client asks a question I’m not prepared for? I’d look so bad in front of my boss, and it would be so embarrassing. Maybe I should go through the slide deck one more time and make sure there’s nothing I’m unsure about.”

In this scenario, you’re driven by a fear of failure. You’re trying to avoid an unpleasant outcome. There is no defined task you can do. Going through the slide deck and searching for something as vague as “a topic you’re not an expert in” is a fool’s errand. A helpful tip: anytime a thought starts with “what if,” it’s likely driven by anxiety.

The Importance of Practice

It takes time and practice to learn to recognize the different voices of intuition and anxiety. But it’s a skill you can develop. Start practicing today. Examine your thoughts and see if you can start to differentiate intuition from anxiety.

Seeking Guidance

Still need help telling the difference? Want to go through a specific situation with an expert? Book a coaching call with me and let's figure it out together!

By understanding these distinctions, you can empower yourself to make better decisions. You can bridge the gap between your technical knowledge and the necessary management skills for impactful leadership.

In conclusion, recognizing the difference between intuition and anxiety is crucial for your personal and professional growth. Trust your intuition, and let it guide you towards fulfilling your goals. Remember, it’s a journey, and every step you take brings you closer to becoming the leader you aspire to be.